Weaning Off

We all fall in love with items and then start using it everyday. After some time the thing becomes an obsession and takes over some parts of your life. As the world gets smarter this will be more and more common.

The best way to reduce addictive tendencies is to try and make the action less accessible. This could mean putting extra obstructions in the way or just not doing things that will not require you to get close to the item.

Another approach is to find other more healthy activities to replace this item or action. The best thing would be to make it at least a bit enjoyable and to try and repeat it consistently.

Don’t let items and behaviours dictate how you spend your time. Take control of your life and you might realise you have so much more time to enrich yourself.

Meaningful

There is mainly two methods that create meaningful relationships. The first is to give and receive. Most of the time it does not matter who is on which side. The second is to actually do something together. This should be in a team setting where people help each other out.

All good relationships are built on these foundations. The very basic family unit is comprised of families giving and receiving. Start cultivating these more and your relationships will grow richer.

Computer predictions

I have been recently disappointed by Google Maps on a number of continuous occasions. The time that it takes for me to get somewhere has lately been out by more than 10 to 15 minutes. I used to rely on it a lot but now I am hesitant. I am confident I will still get there but their routing seems to not be as efficient as before.

From what I gather the amount of information they receive hasn’t quite changed. Their algorithm might be being tweaked it really is hard to know. However what it made me realise is that using data to project the future should be made extremely clear. It is one thing to know how many cars there are on the road, and another to predict how fast each of them drive.

Don’t base all your decisions on data analysis. There will be things that data models cannot predict and it might be much more important than you think.

Uni Promises

University is like a health boot camp. You pay money to an institution, you work like crazy and you get something at the end. In a way you are paying to suffer. In fact the latter guarantees your body to feel good at least for a while.

The premise for going to university as a whole is about graduating. Yet graduating doesn’t guarantee you a job, which is typically what people go to university for. So is it a risk to pay an immense amount of money (and usually youth) for a piece of hope?

The good thing about graduating is the ability to relate to others. You will not be the only one who went through the difficult times. More importantly it is a means of succeeding in something in life. You can be satisfied by the fact that you have a degree in your hand and you worked for it.

The thing is someone was holding your hand all the way. You are under jurisdiction of a certain lecturer’s whims. This generally does not translate well to bringing true success in the real world, because it doesn’t involve following what others are doing.

The real benefit is what Randy Pausch called the head fake. You are really there to make lifelong friends and to try and do whatever you like without worrying that you were too old to risk things. Lectures are online these days, go and live your life.

Neutralise

There are times when I have nearly gotten into car accidents. It could be my fault or it could have been neglect from another driver. Immediately after there is a little bit of fear creeping up. Fear that driving more it may happen again. Fear that I would not be so lucky.

The best course of action I have taken in this situation is to immediately push on the gas pedal to move confidently out of the area. Doing this helps me to limit the association of driving that day with a bad event. Doing this keeps driving a more positive experience.

Our subconscious mind is very strong and it needs to be nurtured to keep out negative associations from neutral experiences. We cannot always keep avoiding things because of a single bad experience.

Agile

We make big plans and we make deadlines. Then we deliver them. That’s all well and good if the project is either been done many times before, or if the task is relatively easy.

That’s where agile thinking comes in and it’s great even for just one thing. It forces people to communicate more. Sometimes we go too far ahead in one direction only to have other people unable to complete the task as intended.

It is quite important that there should be consideration for what others can achieve in case it is actually very difficult. Then the outcome is that much sweeter.

About saying no

Not talking about abuse or anything involving manipulation. I refer to opportunities which present some difficulties and challenges.

We all get this ever so often where we are asked to do something which is beyond our capabilities. Sometimes it’s clear we want to go so the answer will easily be a yes. But what about those grey areas, which are outside your usual scope. Should you say no?

In established major businesses and structures, the default answer is no. The reason behind that is usually there is someone else already tasked with this duty and it’s been given to you. Yet there are times when nobody is responsible for something and you have the chance to champion it. The answer should be yes more often than not.

Times are changing very quickly and we need to continue learning to stay on top of our game. Saying yes keeps your experience on top. And you never know whether what you champion becomes a critical role or a trend later on.

Open Highways

There is a saying I quote from the movie Baby Driver which says “I want to head west on (Route) 20, in a car I can’t afford”. I think this is a good parable of life about what it means to have a dream and hope. What I want to focus on is the open spontaneity this desire entails.

They say if you don’t plan for the future the future happens to you. That is quite true if you have a major plan we would like to achieve. Of course the small mini plans involved in getting this done is also part and parcel. But how about the other parts of life?

I always find it great to have a day unplanned when I am on my own. It gives that awesome feeling of liberty which cannot be replaced. Yet I feel nervous if I don’t have a plan with somebody else. It’s as if life doesn’t function with others without a plan.

Perhaps on the inside we all dread having plans made. Because people hardly meet each other and end up getting so busy with just being themselves. Maybe if we stop overfocusing on needing plans we would really appreciate the beauty of life as is.

Product concerns

When a team builds a product together, very commonly all effort goes to the actual product and not the team dynamics. The result of this is usually that the product becomes very successful but the relationships suffer.

There must always be a balance between the product and the people. Otherwise success will be short-lived or might only enjoyed with some bitterness.

Applying Theories

I read a lot of fascinating stuff from gurus in the form of books. Yet sometimes I fascinate myself with the theories to share with others and forget to apply it to myself.

Always try to take the first steps to apply what you learn. I was pleasantly surprised that some of them really work. Of course it helps greatly if you truly believe it works as well.